On How to Be Lovely

I love to write, as you probably assumed from all my lengthy posts! I actually love literature and writing just comes with that love. If I had gone on in college I would have gotten an emphasis in Greek Mythology. Spence's sister, Megan, created a blog with her old college roommates. The topic is right up my alley, I had a really low self esteem as a teenager and still struggle with believing in myself. Writing for their blog has become therapeutic and a nice distraction from my daily Mommy life. Here is my first guest post. Feel free to check out their blog!

Guest Post: Build Your Own Confidence

Today's post is by a guest blogger, Meg's beautiful sister-in-law Julie. She is a great mom to her three beautiful children and an avid reader. She has also become great at bringing women together, as you will see in this guest post. Since the incident she describes here, she's also started a monthly nickel auction that was featured on KSL news, and she's a founding member of her neighborhood book club. Megan's favorite memory: "While Julie was dating my brother, she was bored because she wasn't living near very many of her friends. She took me to get a manicure with her (which made me feel special as an awkward 13-year-old), but the girl at the salon must have written it down wrong, because she took me back and put a cape on. I almost got a hair cut while Julie laughed in the front. When we finally sorted things out, I ended up with awesome blue nails and a new friend who later became my great, supportive sister."
Enjoy!
Shortly after my husband and I got married, we bought a home in a new city and had a baby boy. I had achieved my dreams in life: go to college, get married, have children and be at home to raise them in a strong family environment. These events did not come easily to me. I had to work hard and fight to obtain them.

I should have been happy to finally achieve my goals, but no one tells you being a stay at home mom is actually lonely, that all the jokes and rumors are true. I also looked around and realized I was the new girl. The neighborhood women already had their social circles and clubs established. Why was I not quickly included? Couldn’t they see I felt excluded?How could I find happiness?


My sister told me about a playgroup she was involved in. Women sitting around talking while their children played? Why had I not thought of this? I wanted to be in a playgroup! I chewed on the idea for 4 months before I gained the courage to begin my very own. I made a list of six other girls I wanted to be friends with and gave them a very scared phone call.

I did not anticipate the overwhelming response. “What a great idea! I would love to participate. I was hoping someone would start a playgroup. I could use a social hour.”

You see, I didn’t know that the skinny tall beautiful girl who could have passed as Rosalie Hale (from Twilight - you know you love it too) would be just like me. She may not appear awkward or nervous, but she still feels the same emotions as I do. We are living in the same lonely cruel world of self doubt. All women are united through our own sabotaging thoughts. We all want to be loved and included.Once I believed I was their equal, I became their equal.

This one act of courage started me on a path I like. I figured out how to survive and find joy. It is still a daily battle to believe in myself and to like who I am (we all have bad hair days). But I make choices that push me to grow and stretch my compassion for others. Get involved. Find your place in life. If there is not one waiting for you, create it. We all just want to be included.